hypnagothic | [The City] IC Contact

[ She wasn't very good at explaining to Heine, and she had gone to him knowing he understood what it meant. What it was like.

Frowning, she stops moving, her hand resting against the raven's side. ]

I thought...I had left that worry behind. Yet there it was— scratching. In the walls, I thought, but no, no...it was me, it's me, they took me away and brought me back and held me down, and then it was scratching to get out.

Because we always get what we deserve.

Edited 2023-12-30 05:13 (UTC)

[ he steps closer to her, standing just behind. he doesn't touch her yet, not when she goes so still. ]

You believe it was ... punishment?

[ The word summons a light cringe, with her immediately covering her ears and looking down and away from the raven as if it has become something else entirely. As though she only just remembers she's allowed to, her eyes squeeze shut with a delay of a few seconds and she huffs. ]

No. But yes.

[ It was more than that, and she's trying her best to remember the other part, to picture something other than the punishment. Where everyone is at peace, laughing and helping one another, and then she can hear the ocean in place of their laughter. Nothing can scratch the water. ]

It was better when they smiled. For...my betterment.

[ he still remains near, but he's more hesitant in touching her now. ]

They? Your captors?

What?

[ That gets her to turn in confusion, dropping her hand when the noise doesn't come. ]

They— No, they were us. [ She shakes her head and clutches at the towel, realizing how she sounds. ] But not us. All over the wall. The moving pictures.

[ Her steps are sluggish when she wanders over to where he left the clothes for her, picking up the shirt with a nuzzle and sigh. ]

I knew, I told her. I told you. It will just keep repeating, and occasionally everything will be so very perfect, and they—we will be perfect, and we will be together where I can smell the ocean. But then, it will sometimes be horrible. All of us will be.

[ ah. he is familiar with that of repeating nightmares, the variations in them only serving to hammer some point home in the dreamer's mind. he had inflicted some on to those deserving of them himself in the past for one reason or another.

he steps in close to her again, this time reaching out to lightly touch her arm. ]

That has ended. You are here, now.

[ She shakes her head again, but stays silent until she's positive that nothing will scratch through. She is speaking of more than just the experience, but her words and her mind are not lining up whenever she gets upset. They trip over one another. The huff is one of frustration at herself. ]

It will happen again. Everything will happen again. We will never be safe.

[ The ouroboros. It makes her nauseous, and her eyes shut to steady herself before attempting to pull the shirt over her head without rubbing it against her wrists. ]

Edited (missing very important words bc what is sleep) 2024-01-01 06:21 (UTC)

[ his had slides up her arm, lightly, making it's way up so that he can cup her face. he doesn't insist that she look at him with the gesture, but his thumb brushes delicately over her cheek, only gently requesting her attention, trying to pull her from the spiral she's about to take again. ]

Vanessa Ives.

[ Blinking her eyes slowly back open to look up, her rambling ceases, but her wide-eyed stare is still terrified even with his gaze on her. There's too much still blocking her vision.

It takes everything for her voice not to crack. ]

I know what I sound like.

[ there's no change in the way he touches her, full of nothing but tenderness. ]

It is to be expected, given what I believe you experienced.

[ 'Experienced'. The word doesn't sound right. It's too clean.

Still blinking, this time with more lethargy and melancholy than panic, she leans slightly into the touch. ]

It wasn't the same, but... It felt like before.

[ he pulls her closer as she leans in, his hand sliding back and into her hair. ]

Before?

[ Sighing, she closes her eyes again, this time with more lethargy. ]

In the white room... When they made me eat...

[ It is a horrible memory, even so fractured, but she's eased with him here, as if she could pretend he was also there in those memories to comfort her. ]

When they took my hair. Before the drill.

[ The scar is small, but it's there. ]

[ his hand is slow, combing his fingers through her hair as if to remind her that it's still there. she's no longer where that place was. ]

... An asylum.

They needed to bind me to the chair those times, as well. [ A quiet sigh. ] I struggled too much.

As one should.

[ She should finish getting dressed before she loses what little energy she can still muster. His touch makes her drowsy. ]

At first, I kept...wondering what you would do. Would you have struggled? Knowing it was futile? You are not so intemperate as I...as I was.

[ Stepping back just a bit, luckily not tripping right onto the mattress, she'll attempt to finish pulling the shirt on. . ]

I dread thinking of anything like this happening to you. But then, you do not anger our captor as I seem to...

[ he lets his hand fall away as she steps back, but still near when she wants him. he seems to hesitate in responding, several moments passing before he speaks again. ]

... I have been summoned in such a manner before. Held against my will. Though it was not as you have experienced.

[ Stunned, she's pulled out of her self-involved trance to pause and stare. Obviously he means something other than the City. How? Who?

Are they still alive for her to rip apart? ]

Who? [ She squints. He had mentioned the Morningstar bearing him ill will, and it is natural for her to blame most things on the Devil. ] Lucifer?

No. They would not dare without cause, which I have not given them.

[ he lifts his hand to gently caress her arm. ]

It matters not. They have met their due.

[ With the shirt covering her thighs, she finally drops the damp towel away completely. His touch again has her leaning his way, reaching to hug and nuzzle at his arm, though the lull to her movement still carries the tension of anger. How glad she is that he escaped whatever other cage once had him.

It does matter, but she shouldn't press. ]

How did it happen?

[ his arm curls around her again, comforting against her back. ]

An amateur that had fortunate timing and powerful tools that he abused to achieve it.

...That much does not sound so very different, after all.

[ She can't say that Dr. Banning was an amateur, but he should never have been considered a doctor or a scientist. Nothing more than a man with a desire and a penchant for cruelty. ]

I can't...imagine anything like an amateur managing such a feat. [ Powerful tools indeed. ] Did he hurt you in any way?

Hurt ... no. He did not touch me during my captivity, only at the beginning before caging me to take my tools.

[ he encourages her towards the bed, handing her the knit pants to finish dressing. not that he's pulling away from her at all. ]

[ The thought of anyone handling him to put him into a cage stirs something in her that makes it difficult to care about anything like covering up her legs. She just wishes to hold him until he no longer has to remember such an injustice.

She wants to know what was done to him, but it doesn't feel right to ask. ]

How... How did you escape?

[ The pants need to be knotted, but she isn't going to worry about rolling up the hem, at least, so it's quick to pull them on with Morpheus there to lean against. She's in no hurry to go jogging anywhere. ]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject